Change

i am working the night shift as i am writing this,

(suprisingly blogspot is not blocked tonight!)

i hope this is the last night shift for me.

i am going to embark on a new journey soon,

insyaallah.

i hope this path that i choose, will be the right one for me.

it wasn't hard for me to choose, as my heart was never here to begin with.

nevertheless, i hope the decision that i am making is the right one 

and the better one for my family and I.

change is difficult.

especially when you have been pulled into the comfort zone.

i used the word pulled because it is something i didnt expect.

the comfort-ness.

the comfy chair that i am sitting on is now gulping me alive. 

yet, luckily, i am still able to pull myself out.

no, dont get me wrong, being comfortable is never wrong.

some people might like it.

heck, they love it.

the security. the stability.

the soft cushion on their back.

but not me.

i need more.

being too comfy is not too good.

i need to challenge myself more.

to know that i can do better, offer better than what i am now.

i need to move forward, to explore.

i want to have the best that i can have.

with all the effort that i can provide.

i want to what i worth.

i want to achieve something that i can be proud of, by giving the maximum i can give.

most of all,

i want to enjoy what i do.

i want to wake up and look forward to what i am doing

not just merely doing it out of obligation.

or responsibility.

so, i pray that this is path that can lead me to that place i am seeking.

it may not be easy,

especially now that i am at such an 'easy going' place.

it will be hard, it will be full of changes.

but changes do not mean negativity.

some say it is a risk

but i call it an opportunity.

i will not know unless i try.

so i am trying.

i dont want to be here and not knowing 

or wonder what could have been.

i am blessed that Hub and parents are being so so supportive.

i am blessed.

much blessed.

i am looking forward to that new chapter.