Of A B C D

I am intrigued by this.

it got me thinking.

If I were to choose, I will definitely choose A, C and D.

Why A?

Oh dear should I say why??? Of course the vomiting and nausea and the tiredness and the backache, headache, stomache. Hyperemesis is the worst! and mine did not help but to hang around until my third timester. Alhamdulillah the third pregnancy was not as bad as the first or the second. but regardless, I am forever traumatized by this. with the needles and drips. and my most important thing to carry everywhere: plastic bag. It was my BFF. heck, it replaced my handbag!

I couldnt travel a lot. All i could do was curled up on my bed and sleep. and I missed eating. I craved eating. anything as long as I could eat. 2nd and 3rd pregnancy was not as bad, but it was still part of the journey. but seeing your child/children and husband being neglected was a very very bad feeling. I felt soo bad that I could not entertain them much, being a mom and a wife. really, I felt so bad.  

on the bright side, I did lose weight. a lot. I ended up with few weight gain, usually about 10kg or less. that was my proud moment. haha (but baby fat is still here though, darn it)

What about B?

Labour is of course painful. I would be mad if I say it did not hurt. I am no bionic woman people.

But Alhamdulillah, I tend to..forget them. u know, like a short term memory. 

probably that's why i have 3 children now.

the feeling of the baby coming out and gulppppp. suddenly the pain stops. 

when the baby cries, suddenly the pain is gone.

that is the perks of giving birth without painkiller. (haha)

Why C & D?

ok, breastfeeding was kind of easy for me for the second one. i had no engorgement issue.

but the first, and the third, it was a bit difficult. 

for the first child of course being a new mom, i didnt have much clue on the real bf situation. i did read a lot on BF during pregnancy but the experience itself is different. the first one was more on milk supply issue. this third one is more on latching issue. her latching caused nipple pain and a lil bit of bleeding. crazy okay. but Alhamdulillah, we are over that now. hopefully.

then there's the almost hourly feeding which leads to sleep deprivation. 

having 2 kids and an infant with u having not enough sleep is really something else. it's like your energy bar is almost zero. u tend to be easily pissed, moody and crying in the middle on the night. 

almost crazy. 

but, nothing beats the look of your child. when u look closely at the helpless body, screaming for your very own attention, u just melt. and then u realize, she will grow out of it and eventually no longer needs u like she does now. u will no longer be her only thing. 

when that time comes, u will long for this crazy moments. 

and u melt and move on with all the energy left in u. 

#eatenergybar

   

Dealing with Green Eye Toddlers

When you have someone new coming into your little family, aka the birth of a new baby, of course everybody would be thrilled and happy and all, including your children.

But that doesnt mean they don't get jealous. 

Jealousy is the difficult part to handle. As a mom.

Ayra had her fair share of green eye moments when Amna was born.

She would come and snuggle with me right when I wanted to nurse her little sister back then. 

Well, same goes to Amna now. 

She would come and snuggle right when Amal needs to be fed. 

and sleeping time involves me patting her with one hand and the other holding Amal while trying to steady myself nursing her.

and she cries a lot to lately. seeking attention ler tu..

and owh, that was nothing. 

When Hub went outstation when we were 2 weeks in confinement, I had to entertain 3 babies altogether. the most difficult part was to putting them to sleep altogether.

one hand must scratch Ayra's leg, another is to Amna.

while putting Amal on the lap and making sure she didnt wake up cos, well, if she wakes up then all my hands go to her alone. if that happens, the her 2 big sisters will throw tantrum from being sleepy.

and at that moment (or even now), I wish i have 8 arms.

If their grandmother/s is/are around, Amna would go to them and be manja manja and all. 

She didnt even bat an eye to me.

okay, mommy got jealous too.

but I guess that's her way of coping with this new life and new baby.

She doesn't hate Amal at all.

In fact she loves kissing her and playing with her.

whenever Amal cries, Amna will quickly call me and show my boobies. She knows adik needs milk.

I learn to spend about 15 minutes at night to sing with her, all her fav songs. 

hug her at any time that I have. kiss her lots and lots.

Ayra too. but hers is quite different. Now that she is sooo talkative and talking non stop all day long, 

i need to make sure her voice is heard. 

and hug and kisses. 

and Thank Allah for their father!

savior to my insanity.

really, I cannot do this without him.

jealousy is quite normal. 

but how we are handling it as a parent is important.

a. we must never show more love towards the other. treat equally. never show favoritism. how would we feel if our parents dont favor us? I never want any of my child to feel unwanted. please God no. 

b. explain to them that we need to tend to the little one because adik is still small and needs to drink milk from mommy. once she is bigger she can play with you.

I am pretty sure they can understand even though they might show a different reaction initially. 

c. patience on the parents' side is also important. i failed this many many time during this confinement period. with the heat, the hormones, the lack of sleep, the tiredness, the breast soreness. I am only human. the flawed one that is. so i tend to lose it and regret it every time. so, dear me, patience. patience.

d. Hugs and kiss them as much as u can in a day. just take a minute or two, and say

"Come and let me hug you. i just wanna hug you.."

then you hug them as long as u can. hug them as if you are going away. 

that meaningful hug. the hug that tells them you are always here for them.

and give them sloppy kisses everywhere!

e. spend like 15 minutes or more if u can, just the 2 of you. talk, sing, chat, play. 

anything they want to do with you. as long as they are happy. then back to nursing mode. 

f. if you are good in multitasking, then great. lay down together, with the baby on your lap and the toddler on your right. put them to sleep like they want to. 

g. as soon as this confinement is over, I need to take two half day off from the baby. to spend a quality time with each of them. need to Amna and Ayra for a bonding session, one on one. typical idea is to bring each to the mall and have lunch, buy something nice and be happy. and only talk about them. not the sisters. 

okay, baby is screaming now. 

back to boobie mode. 

What would my pantang be without jaundice

What would my pantang be without jaundice?

Incomplete. It is like a part of the package. my package. 

wuhuuu lucky me.

--_--

The 2 big sisters had jaundice, so what are the chances this little one has one too?

very very likely.

Not only jaundice, prolong jaundice lagi tu okeh.

So there goes my strict pantang again. 

with the check ups and walking and whatnot. 

Well, at least I am not totally confined in the room or the house.

One way of being positive about this eh??

Ayra and Amna had prolonged jaundice. Alhamdulillah, they were only breastmilk jaundice, which is harmless. Other likely factors had been ruled out such as, UTI, liver issue, thyroid disease, etc. 

Basically, prolonged jaundice is when the jaundice lasts longer than 14 days of life, in term infants.

Prolonged jaundice can be due to factors such as:

• Infection - eg, urinary tract infection.
• Hypothyroidism, hypopituitarism.
• Galactosaemia.
• Breast milk jaundice: the baby is well and the jaundice usually resolves by six weeks but occasionally continues for up to four months.
• Gastrointestinal (GI): biliary atresia, choledochal cyst, neonatal hepatitis
• http://patient.info/doctor/neonatal-jaundice-pro

So, further tests on the baby's blood and urine will be carried out to rule out such causes, and finally we can settle with Breastmilk jaundice, or breastfeeding jaundice.

Those 2 terms are different. 

Breastmilk jaundice is due to the content of the mother's milk. Nope, it is not poisonous nor that it will harm your little one. The actual cause is not clearly understood, but theoretically, it contains an element which interferes with the enzyme that changes excess bilirubin in the blood to a form that is to be eliminated from the body. The elements does not stop the enzyme, but slows down the process. eventually, the excess bilirubin will be eliminated from the body, as the baby's liver matures. 

So, do not stop breast feeding, despite whatever others are telling you.

Breast feeding jaundice is more likely due to a) poor technique on breast feeding by the baby, meaning latching is not good that the baby is not getting enough milk. or, b) milk production is not sufficient. However, should you exclusively breast feed your child on demand and does not restrict him or her from the boobies, your body will produce enough milk for your baby, as the demand is always there. Important rule in BF: When there is demand, there is supply. 

I know breast feeding can be hard. I am with the 3rd child and I still cry when I feel like I fail in Bf. 

Each babies has their own ways and means.

With this one, I did stumble on sore and crack nipple. Only Allah knows how painful it was. 

I cried a bucket and I have fear for every time she nurses. 

But, this is something that I need to do, I have to do. I need to teach her how to latch properly, guide her in every way. eventually she gets it. 

Dont underestimate your baby. you will be amazed on how fast they can learn.

Back to the jaundice, Amal's level went up high more than the borderline level. 

So doctor prescribed her with phototherapy. 

As usual, we rented the UV Phototherapy machine and do it at home.

This is easier for me as we dont have to fork out money to go Private Hospital, or leave our baby in Government Hospital and pump milk and go there daily. (if no bed)

I had traumatic experience in government hospital during Ayra's jaundice time. 

HTAR did not have enough bed and I had to sit in front of her. I was about 3-4 days post birth.

Can U imagine my level of tiredness and exhaustion at that time? Moreover it was our first baby.

I am traumatized till now. 

Luckily our friend introduced us to this company which provides this cool machine.

It really helps us mothers during this confinement period and to attend to our jaundiced baby.

So, we called this company and the machine was sent on the same day.

We put Amal under the light and covered her eyes with the given eye patch. 

I only picked her up when she needed to be fed.

After 2 days, we took her to the clinic to get her bilirubin level checked. 

If it drops down significantly, then we can put it off.

You can contact Bluelite at www.bluelite.com.my.

Their price is also affordable comparing to private hospital hospitalization.

for 2016, we had to pay RM485 for 3 days (72 hours)

2 years ago, during Ayra's and Amna's time, it was about RM350 (i guess).

I googled and found another company offering the same service. 

Try this: Firefly Home Therapy (http://hometherapyy.com/)

Amal's level went down to the acceptable level but it is still quite haywire.

Going slightly up and down.

Hopefully nothing bad.

Welcome little Irene

 

So now, my princesses will no longer be the only Anna and Elsa in my side of family.

in my dad's side, they have always been the littlest ones.

Ayra the first cicit, Amna the second cicit. 

so, attention has always been on them

(whenever we go back kampung)

now, welcoming to the familia, the little girl named

Irene Arianna.

oh my.. she is sooo cute.

that cheeek like a red pau.
she is bulat and chubby!

i didnt know i would be so excited to have her in my arms!

i miss holding small babies i guess

she weighs 3.6kg. it's nice to hold.

she belongs to my bro cousin.

(cant wait to hold this little one. 4 months to go!)

and it was nice to help his wife with breast feeding.

i strongly believe in BF and how the first few hours of life is crucial

in introducing the mother's milk to the little one.

she may stumble, learning at her own pace on how to suckle, etc.

but, we must not say negative things.

what we say to the little one and the mother will reflect the outcome.

support. support. support.

breast feeding can be emotional journey. 

but support makes it a beautiful one.

never give up, and usaha.

and do not ever compare your state with others.

dont compare. dont condemn.

just do your best. 

 

 

 

6/12 Amna

Amna is now 6 month's old. 

she turned 6/12 on 3rd July, the date of our 4th Annivesary.

this post will be about my breastfeeding journey with Amna Nabeela.

Alhamdulillah, our journey together has not been difficult. Thanx to my previous experience in breastfeeding of 1 year and 10month with Ayra, this time around, it feels much lighter. 

i even taught her how to feed while lying down during my confinement because i really could not bare waking up almost every hour for her feeding needs. and yeah, she is a fast learner. 

she is like her big sister in a lot of ways. they feed almost every hour when they were tiny babies. they woke up like every 2 to 3 hours to feed. and dont get me started on the growth spurts! 

amna is more attached to me even when she is 4 months old. she has the separation anxiety too early. much much too early. her eyes would follow me every where, even if i was only going to the kitchen! and she would scream non-stop, on top of her lungs, just for me to carry her.

definitely separation anxiety.

ayah cannot calm her down.nope.

the sound of my voice can trigger her cry. a cry to be picked by only me.

sweet... but im tired.

other than the attachment, amna doesnt like to feed underneath my scarf. she likes it bare. 

well,now i am in trouble dont i.

like she wants mommy's boobies to be displayed. or her nose doesnt get stuck with my baju. or tudung. and her head is not sweating because of the coverings. 

i had to rush to the babyroom whenever she started to whine for feeding.

and she is easily distracted! any noise will make her stop and stare.and pause. and get back on the road. again dear, mommy really has ample time kan to wait..

-_-

she has started on her solid food about 1 week plus prior her 6 months birthday. i made purees of apple, yam and pumpkin. yam is a no no for her. and apple is a yes yes. 

i use the method of preparing just like the one i prepared for ayra. but, instead of steaming, i boil. 

i am short of time. so boiling is faster. 

she wants to grab anything that she can, including my spoon, Kakak's hair, the bowl of ice cream, rice, remote, books, my drinks. and her mouth would go like 'i want i want that looks yummy oh my'.

she is growing up fast! 

tuptup she is 6. 

she is rolling now. rolling like a roller. fast.but she doesnt like doing that for too long. mommy's holding her is much nicer. and calmer and warmer.

and mommy's hands are developing cramps especially at night time

 (coz she likes sleeping on my arm instead of the soft pillow)

so, as time flies, the next thing i know, she can walk.

and run around and play together with her Kakak.

oh i cant wait!

Baby's Skin Essentials

 Ayra has a very delicate skin. if not because of exclusive breastmilk, i think she could have developed eczema like her mummy. (poor mummy). that is another reason why i insist on fully breastmilk feeding. do not want her to develop eczema nor asthma which is hereditary and very common in infants. by bf, it is proven to lower the risk of the infant to develop such condition. having eczema and asthma is very very troubling. i should know. u have to have steroid and inhalers for backup. poor mummy. again.

During her first few days of life, we did not put anything on the diaper area. she was okay actually. no diaper rash what so ever. then my sister in law suggested to put Drapolene to prevent from diaper rash. and so we did. and that was a big fat mistake. her nappy area turned soooo red. i was so worried looking at it. quickly asked hubby to buy Earth Mama Angle Baby Bottom Balm. an organic product that heals napy rash. not only that, it can also heal any rashes or inflammation in other areas except the face. it is organic so i know it is safe for my princess.

Hubby bought it from Little Whiz, an online baby boutique store which happens to be in Setia Alam. so close. suke!! this cost RM49.90 for 2oz. yup. very very expensive for something that you put on a butt! but.. princess punya pasal, mummy rela. haha. later on we bought another jar just to keep my Mom's place.(which is where she is sent to everyday while we're working). however, a jar of 2 oz can last soooo long. till current date of writing, we still have like half a jar of balm! so, really2 money saving. and safe.

Another product that i like from Earth Mama is the nipple butter. you put it on the nipple or breast area to prevent it from cracking. i never had a problem of cracking nipple. so, i guess this is good. if the breast feels like it was about to inflame, especially during the first month after delivery, u sapu it around the area, it will be okay. it is even safe to put on the face. it contains no harmful chemicals. so, when u put it on the nipple area and your baby latches on later, dont worry, no need to wipe it off.. easy.this costs RM69.90.for 2oz. like i said, safe and saving. still have a lot till now.

we used Johnson baby bath head to toe for her bath... unfortunately.. one day.. she develop an odd kind of redness all over her body. we thought it was fungal. or eczema. we tried to eliminate all possible causes. and one of them is the body bath. we changed to Sebamed which is milder. but according to her pediatrician, sebamed is quite drying. and he thought it was eczema rather than fungal infection. so, afraid that Bambam might develop eczema, i bought her an organic body wash from Buds Organic. it's a head-to-toe body wash. i wanted to buy a separate body wash and shampoo, but afraid that it might go into her eyes and sting. the shampoo might sting but the head to toe does not. well, that's what it says on the label. that the head to toe does not sting if enter eyes. so.. will wait till Bambam a little bit bigger to change to shampoo and bath alone. the head to toe has nice smell. lavender like. so i like smelling her hair. btw, it is a malaysian product..  wow.. nice job. tak sangka malaysian nye organic baby product berkualiti!! hahaha.. and the price not that bad..RM25.90..

recently, she developed that similar rash around her back. became worried again. many factors could have contributed.. such as.. we recently introduced chicken and carrot into her meals..so.. could she be allergic to chicken or carrot?? i recently use johnson body milk lotion on her after bath.. well, before this hanya lumur minyak telon..then stop minyak telon..just put baby powder..so.. baru ingat nak try lotion.. then that rash happened. so... stop altogether. the chicken was given again. rechallenged. so far so good. so.. either carrot or lotion. so... lotion makes more sense. carrot is actually the least type of vege that can cause allergy.
so.. now i am surveying organic baby lotion.. buds? or earth mama? or burts bee? there are other brands for babies but..im narrowing down to these 3 brands. easy to find, a lot reviews and only slight expensive.
and i am looking for a sunblock for her! i've been looking for it for quite some time. trying to find an organic sunblock. the active ingredient would be zinc oxide or titanium as they act as external blocker. not a chemical blocker. when u apply this, it will not be absorbed into the skin. it acts as an outer layer of protection. so.. should be safe. still looking around for a suitable brand..

another Buds product that is essential when u live in Malaysia is.. Buds Mozzie Clear lotion. Ayra is very much loved by mosquitoes! no matter what we do, even if we put her under the net, somehow the mozzies are one kejam little creature that can find a tiny2 gap to enter. poor Bambam. many bites on her delicate skin.. so.. i bought this, and tried it on her.. the redness dissappears quiet quickly and definitely the mozzies stay away! so, this product is a must especially when we go back to Terengganu. it's like living in a jungle of mozzies!! i even put it on me! cos the mozzies just love me as much as well! pfffft

and so.. the search for the best for my little princess continues...
google time!!

ps: no one wanted to sponsor me to write about this. so i write it for free to promote them. hahahahah. well..not to promote lorrr. to share..

From Zero to Seven

Bambam is 7 months old recently. 24.6.2012 (Dina's birthday. wohoo).
sometimes i can't wait for the time when she can do lots of things, especially walking. she is getting heavier each day! sometimes i feel the time really runs too fast.
when i first gave birth to her, during the 1st month of confinement period, i'd say, it was the hardest time of my life. even harder than popping her out of my oven. hehe. she had jaundice that seemed like it would never ever go away. (a month of jaundice okay!) the sleep deprivation, the breastfeeding issues, the sore and engorgement, the messy house and messy hair. the tiredness of going back and forth to the clinic to check her bilirubin level, the mind bugging worry why is her jaundice is sooo long. worry here and there. fuhhhh.
it was tough! 

the first day of life. my Ayra Nabeeha.

Bambam had jaundice for a month!

Mummy's girl sunbathing under the blue ray light.

im chilling, Mummy!

 And now, here we are. 7 months later. it is very hard to put her on diapers! and she likes to kick her feet and babbles sounds. alhamdulillah, i am still able to provide her with breastmilk. am still able to give her the Liquid Gold. breastfeeding is a challenge. physically and emotionally challenging and demanding. but, with strong determination of providing her with the best nutrition, i patiently went through, and still going trough the journey of breastfeeding. support is important. im lucky to have supports from both parents and husband and my friends, especially Azza. she is like a hardcore cheerleader in breastfeeding. i can see her throwing her pom pom screaming Go Arina Go Arina! Gimme a B. Gimme a R... haha..

to have a successful breastfeeding journey, support form those who are close to u is very important. try to stay away from negative people. i did have a share of those. it was hurtful especially when it comes form your own family. but, then again, u have to be strong. in the end of the day, your child, you are the parent, and u know what is the best for your child.

Bambam started on solid when she was 5 and half month. she was too eager to taste solid. she would show much interest in what we were eating. when we started solid, i followed the recommendations mentioned in Wholesome Baby Food. the web helps u with what to give and what not to your baby, even if she is less than 6 month. this is because according to WHO, babies should only have milk up to 6 months old. after 6 months, then only we can start introducing solid. i strongly believe in that, but Bambam could not wait. she was throwing tantrum and waking up more often at night, so we decided to start her on solid. she's better then. nevertheless, she is still breastfeeding as usual (even doe a lilttle bit less than before), so im okay..

i'll post more on how i prepare her meals, the puree and baby cubes later. it's an interesting process preparing her food. but also an exhaustion so we only do it on saturday night. it needs a longer time to write!

Bambam during her favorite part of the day

just thinking about her makes me smile. her wits. her smile. her laughter. she is the type of baby who does not cry when she wakes up. she will give u the sweetest smile when she open her eyes and sees you. and no matter how sleepy i am and grumpy for having enough sleep, but when i look at her smiling at me, i melt.
melt like butter in a saucepan.

she's up stairs sleeping and im missing her already!